Friday, September 17, 2010

Harmless Little Fantasy

Yesterday I was asked about my interest in a job based on the misconception that I speak multiple languages. It pained me to have to tell the person that not only am I not multi-lingual, I am barely proficient in one language and one language only.

I often fantasize about being able to tell people that I speak 8 languages (I think I came to the number 8, because of knowing a person who speaks 7 and I have to one up this person). I imagine the shock and awe on people's faces when they hear of my amazing abilities to converse in so many languages, and of course I so humbly tell them of it, not wanting to brag. The modesty on my part is a pivotal part of the fantasy.

The reality is I have no desire to spend the hours upon hours it would take to master another language, I just want to be able to say that I speak another language. It's like my desire to tell people I have a doctorate in Russian Literature (which of course would go with my ability to speak, read and write Russian) - I have no true interest in this subject, I just want the bragging rights.

Am I the only person that has these fantasies? Are there people out there who HAVE accomplished major feats and fantasize that they accomplished something else? The truth is, if you tell me what it is you fantasize being able to tell others I will inevitably try to one up you. If you tell me your fantasy is to tell people that you climbed Mt. Everest, then mine will become climbing Mt. Everest backwards...while conversing with everyone coming down the mountain...in their native language.

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